Ten Inspectaneck Improvements to American Idol

Posted on Tue 02/28/06 in TV Show Reviews

I propose the following with regard to the TV show American Idol

  1. Make Simon tape his nipples down so we don’t have to look at them through his shirt.

  2. Send electric shock to Randy every time he says dog, man, chillin, or pitchy.

  3. Give Ryan Seacrest a raise; he is a genius.

  4. Spin-off a Paula Up-close with the Contestants: Late Nite HBO special, where Paula can pursue her crushes and perhaps control her excessive drooling.

  5. Never schedule the show during the Winter Olympic event of curling. Go Sweden!

  6. Make singing “Cold Hearted Snake” a required performance during the competition.

  7. Show more men crying.

  8. Disqualify contestants with grey hair.

  9. Post the resume of Randy Jackson at the beginning and end of the show… like a public service announcement… to remind the viewers that he actually has some musical credentials.

  10. And finally…. just take the show off the air along with all the rest of the worthless reality shows on the tube. Yes, I realize: Poor business decision; Admirable moral decision.

Something to add?

# DW wrote on Tue 02/28/06 at 09.48 PM:

well said

# stopher wrote on Wed 03/01/06 at 03.51 PM:

man u are crazy the gray hair guy !%^$# rocks it’s like he’s drugged up by music, in hip hop terms “he’s feelin it yo”

# Jim Miles wrote on Fri 03/03/06 at 09.43 AM:

I agree with stopher.

# james wrote on Wed 03/08/06 at 09.59 PM:

It is quite obvious that you have never watched America’s Next Top Model

# Dawn wrote on Thu 03/23/06 at 07.45 PM:

I would have to agree with stopher and jim about the crazy gray haired dude. I think Randy got a bad crash course in “being down, yo” and so he has to add the dog and better yet, dog pound to his small amount of vocabulary.

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